Unimportant.

These days have been crazy.

Nothing changed at home. I still refuse to talk to anyone. I don't see the point of talking anymore because nothing will change.

Hadi sent me a long text the other while I was out. About how I'm giving an attitude, how mum has been tearing up, how dad has been worried. But one thing tho, he didn't ask how am I. He mentioned everything about how I'm giving an attitude, not talking, ignoring everyone. Nobody asked how I'm feeling. That's how not important I am to them. I feel bad for ignoring everyone but I feel worst knowing I don't mean anything to everyone. Perhaps I've been hiding my feelings for too long.

Sadly, I feel unimportant to Love too. I guess I really am not in his priority list. If I really am, and if he really misses me then wouldn't he at least text me whenever he can, at least just to ask if I've eaten, or ask how am I doing? I can't always be staying up all night waiting for him to video call me. There's nothing much I can say or share either cause he'll be sharing about his day and either I'm too sleepy or he's rushing to hear me out. I mean, video call is one thing but that doesn't mean there's no need for texts. I hate getting blue ticks! and ignored the whole day and the excuse? He's has a tough day or busy day. If he has time to update his ig story and his last seen is always a few minutes before then he should have time to text me right? What am I to him exactly?

And whatever I say, at the end of the day, I'll be at fault. At the end of the day, I'll be the one blamed. Family, Love and work.

I'm not a robot.